Hey guys this is chapter 15 of my book, I know it’s late but better late than never.
The ride to school seemed longer, but that was just the bruises talking. As I reached school a mental weariness overcame me. The last two months had brought changes I never could have expected. While all the powers possessed by the group were powerful in their own way, none of them posed as much of an inconvenience than that of Bharat. His ability to read peoples minds meant that I was under surveillance everytime I stepped into the school.
As a new form of torture Bharat had devised was attacking me mentally when I wasn’t expecting it. Initially I didn’t even notice it and Bharat had walked away with personal details about my life that I had never told anyone. After that quick lesson that Bharat had rubbed in, I was much more careful, but trying to keep someone like Bharat out of your head is harder than you would think. Once I started to create barriers for n my mind I found that I could actually feel it when he tried to get into my head, and it hurt.
Once he gave up on stealth, Bharat thought it was necessary to use brute force. The combined effort of having to block Bharat and dealing with the injuries Devon inflicted was slowly driving me nuts. It was the equivalent of having someone punch me in the face repeatedly while my whole body was aching.
I suppose punching him in the face would have stopped him from doing this, but something told me that even now he wasn’t exerting his whole power and that if he did start doing that, we would end up having more than just a severe argument.
I saw the class with new eyes now. I never had really thought of the others as peers, they were simply people of the same age group, but now I couldn’t find q single thing in common with them. Their world seemed alien to me. Now that I knew about these powers and about what went on when they were asleep, I couldn’t imagine ever being one of them. But then again I knew that long before I knew about these powers.
Aside from my perception of the kids something else had also changed. I now had someone sitting next to me, and as I walked into the class the person concerned started waving madly. Patrick had become my bodyguard/chaperone/……friend of late. Something about being hit in the head for someone must inspire trust because he was determined to be my new best friend.
I guess I could have put up a fight when Bharat had come up with this new arrangement but somehow I couldn’t bring myself to do it. My life had changed so much recently and I had no one to talk to about it, at this time having Patrick as a friend was useful. He was the only mildly sane member of the group. Bharat was bat-shit crazy,Devon was a vindictive Neanderthal, Salem was just gutless and Jalal…. was damaged. Patrick was the only one I could take a breath around and he had saved my life I guess.
I sat down next to Patrick and was faced with his blinding smile that was so out of place in his dark toned face. His smile was so sincere that I couldn’t help but give a small smile in return, which got quickly wiped off when I turned and saw Bharat again. He was also smiling but in his case it was the brightest most fake thing I had ever seen. As soon as I registered his presence the pain in my head started again. I winced once before I could school my expression. Then I looked at him again and turned away to look at the teacher that had had just entered the class. This was going to be a long day.
Well that was chapter 15. As you guys may know I really do plan to publish this book once I clear the many flaws so I wanted to announce that since I plan on making around 40 chapters, I’m going to stop uploading chapters once I hit the twenty mark. I’ll probably give some of you guys the book anyway but I’ve still decided to stop uploading once I upload the twentieth chapter.
So here comes the question. I wanted to hold a survey, I know that there are many flaws in this. Narrative inconsistency,grammatical problems,spelling issues and just a general lack of detail and chapter length shortage to name a few, but I wanted to ask you guys, keeping in mind the general story and the characters do you think this is a kind of book you would buy.
I’m not trying to trap you and of course I won’t ask you to buy the book but I wanted to know if the general demographic which is teens would like a different kind of YA novel. I’m open to criticism but keep in mind that it should be constructive. Don’t just say something like “it sucks” because I won’t believe you. If there is a genuine problem you have with it then I will listen to it.